Saturday, May 9, 2009

complete trust?

the countdown is on... less than 48 hours until my first final and somewhere between 48 and 60 hours before my second final!

Nervous? Yes!
Studying? Like crazy!
Depending on myself to make it through these tests? NO!

I finally decided it would be best to let God run with this one. I have been making myself SICK just thinking about finals. Weighing every option, panic stricken with fingers flying back and forth across the number pad on the calculator...trying to figure out to the 10th of a percent what i absolutely HAVE to have on the final to pass each class!

So today I decided, why give myself ulcers, headaches, nausea, sleep deprivation and no appetite?! Why am I killing myself over this stuff...this is NOT what was originally planned.

Why not just hand it over to God and say 'here you go...my school is in your hands...you guided my steps to get me here, I'm here for a reason, being a Nurse is my passion, you won't lead me astray. I place it all in your hands, guide me the day of finals, bring back to remembrance what I have studied, I put my faith and trust in you...'

If that isn't the hardest thing to do! Giving up our own control and desires to be independent and 'fend for ourselves'. The way God created us...but He also created us to love and trust Him. HE guides us through life, if we'll ONLY LET HIM...this is one of those times!!

Here we go! The clock is ticking!

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